The much-delayed airport has opened with hardly any flights and passengers

At last Berlin has a new airport, but it couldn’t have come at a worse time. 

Only 8 years and 4 months since the previously announced opening date of June 2012, the new Berlin-Brandenburg Willy Brandt Airport (BER) airport has finally been completed.  With the travel industry in crisis due to the global Covid pandemic and airlines facing the prospect of bankruptcy, Saturday’s unveiling of the “new” airport is rather ironic. 

When I first heard that the long-awaited airport would be finally opening its doors to the public on 31 October 2020 my reaction was: "I’ll believe it when I see it". The second was: "Halloween, the spookiest day of the year. What a bizarre choice of date". At that time, we still had no idea that the world would be turned upside down by a global pandemic caused by a coronavirus.

As Germany braces itself for a second, albeit “lighter” lockdown, BER airport opened on Saturday with only about six scheduled arrivals and amid climate protests. On the one hand, it’s hard to believe that they actually managed to finish it. I have to admit that I had my doubts as to whether it would ever be completed. On the other hand, you can’t help but think that the timing of it is a joke. 

The opening gala had to be cancelled because of the growing number of Covid cases in Berlin and in Germany.  Though it wouldn’t have been a big party anyway. Apparently, the managers and engineers of the airport felt too embarrassed to celebrate the over 8-year long fiasco.

Meanwhile, the list of countries and regions at high Covid risk (in German Risikogebiete, as compiled by the Robert Koch Institute) is getting longer and longer, meaning that if you go on holiday almost anywhere in the world you now have to go into quarantine on return. Moreover, from Monday 2 November the whole of Germany is going into partial lockdown and travelling is strongly discouraged.

For the past years Berlin has been a laughing stock because of its airport. I’m afraid it will take a long time for it to turn its image around.

In case you're wondering what will happen to the other airports, Tegel airport (pictured) is scheduled to close next week. This time it's for real. The last ever flight from Tegel is due to depart at 15:00 on 8 November for Paris. As a result, the Berlin district of Pankow will notice a significant reduction in noise pollution. The other remaining airport, Schönefeld, will continue to operate as part of the new BER airport and will be known as Terminal 5. Tempelhof airport was closed in 2008.

Do you miss travelling?

Travelling in Covid (and post-Brexit) times is challenging

We all have our tales of travel mishaps: delays, cancellations, technical problems, strikes, lost luggage, adverse weather conditions... the list is endless. Since the start of the Covid pandemic, travelling has entered a whole new stressful dimension, raising all sorts of questions, such as: 

What are the travel entry requirements? Do I need to take a test before departure? Do I need a test on arrival? Is an antigen rapid test (i.e., lateral flow) sufficient or do I need a PCR test? What does fully vaccinated mean? Which vaccines are accepted? Do I need a booster jab? Will I need to isolate on arrival? What are the rules for children? Do I need to fill out a form? Do I need a digital passenger locator form or a different sort of form? What kind of mask do I need to wear? Is an FFP2 mask required?

Welcome to the world of travelling during Covid times. And even if you think you may have found the answers to those questions, please bear in mind that travel rules change all the time, often without warning. This could be due to several reasons, e.g., a sudden rise in Covid cases or the emergence of a new variant or simply the government changing its mind. And once you get to your destination, make sure you comply with the country’s Covid restrictions, which by the way change all the time as well.

Italy in June

My family didn’t do much travelling in 2020 for obvious reasons. However, with the arrival of vaccines and, as we hadn’t seen some family members for over two years, we decided to be more adventurous in 2021. We finally got to see the “new” BER airport for the first time in June 2021, when we travelled to Italy to visit my parents. I’m afraid to say it wasn’t love at first sight. There was an air traffic control strike in Italy that day, so Ryanair changed all its flight times. The problem was that the airport screens were still showing the original times, so we witnessed scenes of panic as passengers arrived at the airport thinking that they had missed their flights. The queues for check-in and security were so long that we almost did miss our flight. Luckily it was delayed.

Sweden in September

In September we visited our relatives in the south of Sweden. It all went well on the way there. The ferry from the port of Sassnitz in northern Germany left on time and, as we were vaccinated, we didn’t need to take any Covid tests, while our son had taken a self-test at school that morning. However, on the way back, one of the ferry engines broke down so the whole journey took much longer than expected and we ended up arriving in Berlin in the early hours of the morning after driving through the night in treacherous weather conditions. At least this particular problem wasn’t Covid related.

England in October

In October we flew to Gatwick airport to visit my grandmother for the first time in two years. We left Berlin on the first day of the school autumn break. Luckily, we were booked on the late afternoon flight, and we avoided the morning mayhem (queues so long that passengers missed their flights). Everything was going smoothly until we reached border control. I always use my UK passport when travelling to the UK, but this was my first time travelling to the UK under the new Brexit rules. The immigration officer took my passport and gave me a quizzical look and said something about needing to stamp it because the UK is no longer a member of the EU. After a few seconds of panic, I exclaimed: “But I’m Italian” and dutifully produced my Italian ID card. The man looked relieved. “That’s more like it” he said or something to that effect in German. I spent the rest of my time at the airport wondering whether they would let me back into the country. At that point I still didn’t have an Italian passport, but I do now. Once we arrived in England, we spent a fortune on our Day 2 PCR tests, as two out of three tests initially showed up as inconclusive, so we ended up taking and paying over £200 for two additional tests at a testing facility in a car park near Gatwick airport. When we flew back to Germany, our 9-year-old son had to isolate at home for five days as we were returning from a high-risk Covid area, and he wasn’t vaccinated. At that point vaccines for children under 12 hadn’t yet been approved in the EU. 

Italy in December

Having spent Christmas on our own in Berlin in 2020, we decided we would try to fly to Italy to spend Christmas with my parents in 2021. It took me over two hours to sort out the necessary paperwork and book the required Covid tests. On Christmas Eve we arrived at BER airport three hours before departure. We weren’t going to take any chances this time and we checked in with plenty of time to spare. Luckily, we all tested negative on the day before the flight and at the airport in Palermo. We had planned to stay in Italy for ten days, but on 30 December the Robert Koch Institute in Germany announced that Italy would become a high-risk area on 1 January 2022. What did that mean? We started reading through all the rules and regulations and discovered that our son would again need to self-isolate for five days in Germany because he wasn’t fully vaccinated, missing a whole week of school. We quickly changed our flight to the one leaving the following morning, New Year’s Eve. Suddenly we needed to pack and get our son tested that same afternoon. On the morning of 31 December, we boarded the plane to Berlin, only to be told that there was a technical problem and were bussed back to the terminal. We ended up waiting for seven hours at the airport in Palermo for a substitute plane to arrive. We eventually landed in Berlin at 8 pm on New Year’s Eve, four hours before the new rules came into effect. So our son avoided isolation, but we were exhausted by the time we got home and didn’t feel too much like celebrating the New Year. 

Travelling in Covid times is a nightmare, even if you’re tennis star Novak Djokovic. As you probably know, he recently spent four days in a detention centre in Australia because of doubts over his visa and he still faces the threat of deportation from the country.  Travel requirements are complicated and rules may even change while you are mid-flight. Needless to say, I won’t be planning any more trips abroad for a while.

Flying in the time of coronavirus

Cancelled flights, concerns about the safety of air travel, worries about the rise in the number of Covid-19 infections at destination and the eventuality of quarantine on return mean that flying in the time of coronavirus can be a nightmare. It is not surprising therefore that many people have decided not to go abroad this summer. Others, meanwhile, have opted to travel by car to avoid being in close contact with potentially infectious travellers.

 

Is it safe to fly?

If you don’t fancy the prospect of driving 2,500 Km or more to visit your family, flying is probably the fastest and safest option, albeit not the most environmentally friendly. According to experts, if you consider various forms of travel, such as bus and train, the risk of Covid transmission inside an aircraft cabin might actually be the lowest. This is because planes use a hepa (high-efficiency particulate air) filter that ensures air inside the cabin is either fresh or recirculated. However, the risk increases if the plane is full, especially if you are sitting next to someone who is infected.

Will my flight be cancelled?

Bearing all this in mind, my family and I set off for Berlin’s Tegel airport by taxi on a bright sunny morning at the end of June. We all wore face masks, including the taxi driver, and we had the car window open to let in a steady breeze. I carried a selection of spare masks in my hand luggage, as well as travel-size hand sanitiser and disinfectant – the essential items when travelling in the coronavirus era.  We had already had one set of flights cancelled by Lufthansa in June (only 12 days after booking – we are still waiting for a refund, as are thousands of others) and, right up until boarding, I had doubts about whether our Swiss flights actually existed and whether we would make our connecting flight in Zurich.

 

Will social distancing be possible?

When we arrived at the airport, Tegel was almost deserted and most of the shops were closed. The queue at the bag drop was much shorter than usual, and passengers generally observed the mask-wearing and physical distancing rules. Once we got to our gate, it became more difficult to keep a distance from others, as more people arrived, so we moved upstairs, where we found fewer people and more comfortable seats. When the announcement to board the plane was made, the airport staff made the usual distinction between business and economy passengers, but other than that we were all called to board at the same time. It was difficult to maintain a physical distance, especially when queuing in the jet-bridge, but at least everyone was wearing a mask.

 

What happens on board?

Once on board, we were greeted by the mask-wearing crew and we were given a disinfectant wipe. The idea is for passengers to disinfect all surfaces close to their seat. We were also given a questionnaire to fill out with our contact and travel details, including our seat number on the plane. According to the airline Swiss, “where possible, neighbouring seats will be kept vacant”, but both our planes were full and, as far as we could tell, there were very few free seats. Swiss has a “modified and partly reduced onboard service”, which “aims at reducing the number of physical interactions between crew and guests”. As both our flights were over 45 minutes, there was a reduced beverage service and on our second flight we were given a snack. There were no Duty-Free sales though. Zurich airport was busier than Tegel, as there were more flights departing. Most shops were closed, but we were able to buy sandwiches.

 

Are the regulations the same in other EU and Schengen countries?

I’ve already written about the confusion caused by the contradictory information regarding Covid. To add to the confusion, when you travel abroad, you discover that each country has different regulations about face masks and physical distance.  For instance, at Zurich airport wearing a face mask is not compulsory, but passengers are encouraged to wear one if a 1.5 m distance cannot be observed. As we were queuing to board our flight to Palermo, we heard an announcement about larger pieces of hand luggage to be placed in the hold.

 

What are the regulations when travelling to Italy?

The Italian National Civil Aviation Authority (ENAC) has prohibited the use of overhead lockers. Small handbags are still allowed, as long as they can be placed under the seat in front of you. The measure is intended to facilitate boarding and disembarking and avoid the formation of crowds. Once on board, we were advised to wear our protective masks. They are compulsory on all Edelweiss flights, “whenever social distancing is not possible”. After take-off, there was another announcement, presumably as we were now flying over Italian airspace: in Italy it is mandatory to wear a protective mask on airplanes at all times. We were also given a self-certification form to fill out declaring we were not suffering from Covid or subject to quarantine. When we landed in Palermo, we disembarked as usual and walked into the terminal, where our body temperature was scanned. After waiting an hour for our luggage, we discovered that 55 suitcases were missing, including ours. Apparently, there had been a problem at Zurich airport. Two days later, after having our body temperature scanned three times at different points in Palermo airport and after a security check, we were finally able to collect our luggage.

 

Do I need to quarantine?

If you travel to Italy from other EU and Schengen countries there is no requirement for quarantine, but it’s probably wise to keep an extra distance from others, just in case.

Life coming out of lockdown: week 12

It turns out that I was wrong. Although the lockdown restrictions are being relaxed, it’s not over yet and it won’t be over – not for me and not for other parents in a similar situation – until school and/or nursery is back to normal, or at least five mornings a week.

Conversations with mothers

«I’m fed up... I’ve had enough... It’s too much... I can’t bear it anymore... I feel as if I’m going mad... I’m depressed... I hate home schooling... I can’t wait for the summer holidays to begin... I feel for parents like you: I’m so glad my son is 18!».

These are fragments of conversations I’ve had with other mothers this week. This is not a contest for who has had the worst time in lockdown, as I am aware that a lot of people have suffered for a number of different reasons, including loneliness. From the conversations I’ve had this week, it's clear though that the mental health of parents, and especially mothers, has been badly impacted by the lockdown. I know that this is true in my case.

Surviving lockdown without grandparents 

Initially it wasn’t all bad. Many of us even enjoyed having more time to spend with our children without facing the pressures and time constraints of everyday life. I certainly did. But after weeks of isolation, home schooling, tantrums and bad nights, the lockdown started to take its toll. Talking to other parents, it seems that the ones who have managed to cope relatively well through these difficult times are couples that have been able to share home schooling and childcare responsibilities, or those with nearby grandparents or other relatives. I was surprised ( and envious) to find out that several children in my son’s class have been studying with their grandparents during lockdown.

 

Enjoying a visit to the dentist

This week my son went to school on Thursday and Friday for a grand total of seven hours. In that time, I managed to squeeze in a pilates class (my pilates/yoga studio actually reopened on Tuesday, but I joined in via Zoom to save time), a visit to the dentist, which involved travelling by public transport for the first time since face masks became compulsory and an express visit to the beautician. I had two dental appointments this week, as I wasn’t able to go during lockdown. Usually having my teeth cleaned twice a year is an ordeal, but this time I almost enjoyed it. It was the first time in months that I had a whole hour to myself, without feeling any pressure to be productive, while my son and husband were at home together. The hygienist is a very nice lady and any form of live social interaction with a friendly human being is most welcome these days, even when their face is covered by a mask and shield and they are dressed like surgeons.       

 

Travelling by public transport

Surprisingly travelling by public transport was more relaxing than usual. The trams and S-Bahn trains were fairly empty, and it was easy to get a seat and keep a distance of 1.5 m from the other passengers. The announcement in English «Together against Corona» made me chuckle. Most people wore face masks or some sort of face cover, but there was one lady coughing without a mask, so everyone tried to keep a distance from her. It seems that Berliners would still rather avoid travelling by public transport, if possible. There certainly are a lot of bikes on the streets, but I’ve noticed that there are a lot of cars driving around as well. The air quality has definitely deteriorated.

 

Wearing a face mask and sunglasses indoors

I still haven’t got used to wearing a mask and on two occasions I have walked into a bakery wearing my face mask, while forgetting to take my sunglasses off. It happened in two different bakeries by the way. It took me a while to realise that it was darker than usual, as I was too focused on the sensations triggered by the mask, like warmth, difficulty breathing and hearing the muffled sound of my voice. It’s actually more challenging speaking a foreign language when you’re wearing a mask.

 

To close or not to close? The Tegel airport saga continues

 

In times of uncertainty like these, it’s reassuring to know that some things never change. A few weeks ago, it was announced that Tegel airport would be closing on 15 June, for two months, if not permanently. The closure of Tegel was supposed to happen eight years ago but was postponed due to significant problems with the new airport, called Berlin Brandenburg airport or BER, currently scheduled to open on Halloween this year. This week it turned out that Tegel won’t be closing in June after all. Now that air travel is picking up again, it seems that Tegel will be needed for a while longer. Despite the non-closure of Tegel, airlines have been cancelling flights out of the airport, including the one that we had booked less than two weeks ago. So now we have to find an alternative way to get to Sicily and visit the grandparents. Danke Lufthansa. 

A BBQ on the runway

While the rest of the world is busy building new airports and adding runways to existing airports, Berlin has decided that one airport is more than sufficient. Unfortunately things haven't quite turned out as planned and two years after the official closing of Tegel, the airport is alive and busier than ever. (More on the subject of airports another time...) 

However, Berlin did manage to close down one airport and to turn it into a giant park with picnic/BBQ areas, rollerblading and cycling paths, basketball courts and dog exercise areas.... welcome to the Tempelhofer park!

Last May Berliners (unfortunately the non-German residents were excluded) were called to vote in a referendum to decide whether the Templehofer park should stay as it is or to give way to a large-scale property development, including a public library. Non surprisingly (in a city constantly battling between modernisation plans and staying true to itself) around 65 percent of voters rejected the development plans and decided to keep Tempelhofer Feld as a public park. 

So if you're looking for somewhere to go on a Sunday, possibly without crowds of tourists or hipsters, Tempelhof is the place to go. Oh and don't forget your kite!

Surviving the winter lockdown

#StayatHome

So here we are again, only this time it’s worse. We’re in the middle of the second wave of the Covid pandemic and the situation is serious. For the first time since the beginning of this crisis all three traffic lights of the coronavirus-warning system for Berlin are red. The number of Covid-related deaths in Germany is at a record high. The lockdown measures have been toughened once again and even stricter restrictions are expected to be announced next week. 

Unless you keep a steady eye (or ear) on the local news, it’s impossible to keep up with all the changes. The Tagesspiegel App has become my bible. At the moment we can meet only one person from another household (children are now included in the calculation). We are not supposed to leave the house unless we have a valid reason. We are also not supposed to leave Berlin, or at least we can’t go further than 15 km from the border into Brandenburg, our neighbour state. 

The spring lockdown was bad enough, but the winter lockdown is on another level. Winter in Berlin is always a difficult time of the year. I’m not just saying this because I grew up in Sicily. Even native Berliners struggle with the long, grey and dark days, when catching a glimpse of the sun for just a few minutes feels like a miracle. Now that we spend most of our time at home, the days and weeks are a blur. They all seem to be melting into one long week. It feels surreal. Is this really happening or is it all a bad dream? 

Schools have been closed for a month now and the whole school situation has been terribly mismanaged, with conflicting information and backtracking on decisions. Home schooling is proving to be an even greater challenge than during the previous lockdown. Finding the assignments for the week is a bit like a treasure hunt, as the information is uploaded on different websites or arrives by email. Excuses to avoid studying include “I’m hungry”, “I’m tired”, “my arm hurts”, “I need the toilet” and my favourite “my pen exploded”.  Today I read in the news that home schooling and working from home are not compatible. How insightful.   

The online learning platform called Lernraum Berlin (the website that all teachers and students in Berlin are supposed to use) is totally unreliable and keeps crashing. On several occasions, we’ve had to resort to alternative websites for videoconferences. I’m starting to wonder if the people responsible for Lernraum Berlin are the same ones that were managing the construction of the “new” airport.

Talking of Berlin-Brandenburg Willy Brandt Airport (BER) airport, it has been back in the news this week, as employees have reported suffering electric shocks while checking passenger luggage! You couldn’t make this stuff up.

On a positive note, and to parents’ relief, the playgrounds in Berlin are still open, at least for the time being (this wasn’t the case in spring). Usually, playgrounds are deserted at this time of the year, but not now, as they are currently the only place where children can let off steam. 

If you are looking for distractions to survive the winter lockdown, here are some recommendations. 

This week I’ve been watching British sitcom Mum on the Arte App (where you can watch films and tv series in the original language without subtitles). It’s a slow-moving “comedy” with a great cast about a recently widowed, middle-aged woman called Cathy. It has funny moments, but it also makes you cringe. Some of the other characters are quite horrible and you do wonder how Cathy manages to stay so calm and gentle. 

I also watched the documentary Bethany Hamilton: Unstoppable on Netflix . It tells the inspiring story of surfing champion Bethany Hamilton, who lost her arm in a shark attack while surfing as a teenager, and made a comeback against all odds. 

Also on Netflix, the documentary The Social Dilemma will put you off using social media forever, or for a while at least.

I’ve been reading A Manual for Cleaning Women by Lucia Berlin, who has been praised as “a literary genius” in recent years. It’s a wonderful collection of short stories based on events from the author’s diverse and itinerant life. Whether they are based in laundromats, classrooms or the emergency room, Lucia Berlin tells vivid stories with humour and compassion.  

I’ve also been reading The World’s Worst Teachers by David Walliams with my son. Plenty of funny moments in these gruesome stories about the 10 worst teachers in the world, with great illustrations by Tony Ross.

Finally, I’ve been listening to the podcast called The Writer’s Voice, where New Yorker fiction writers read their short stories. A great chance to hear a good story told by its author.

*The poster (pictured) tells Berliners to wear face masks and to follow the Corona-rules. It is a play on the words rumgurken, which can be translated as "hang out" and comes from the word Gurke, i.e. cucumber and Rübe, which means turnip or carrot but is also used to describe an ugly nose.

Io parlo Deutsch

 Growing up with three languages part 2

I have recently read some interesting articles and studies about bilinguals, but I have found very little on trilinguals.

When I was a child and teenager (back in the 80's and 90's) being bilingual was not that common. I remember being on a school trip and phoning home from a telephone box, with my Italian class mates listening in fascination as I spoke English to my Mum. What was normal to me was special for most of them.
These days being bilingual is not such a big deal, but being trilingual still is.
I know a few children being raised with three languages and my son is one of them. As with most parenting issues, I tend to ignore the advice I don't agree with and follow my own instincts. In this case my instinct told me that we should try to raise little one with three languages right from birth.
His first words were a mixture of German, Italian and English and by a very early age he could already distinguish between the three languages. When he was two years old and started constructing actual sentences, there was a prevalence of German, which is the language of the country we live in. But whenever we spent some time in Italy or England, his vocabulary would suddenly expand and he would become more confident in the other two languages.
By the age of three, Leo's Italian was at the same level as his German (especially after spending several weeks in Italy over the summer holidays), but his English mainly consisted of simple "yes" and "no" answers and some basic words. 
During the past year, he has often surprised us with his growing understanding of English sentences. Before he turned four he could follow most of what we were saying in English and watch Peppa Pig or Thomas the Tank Engine in English without any problems. Then around his fourth birthday and after spending time in Italy with his Italian and English family, we had a breakthrough: little one suddenly started speaking English, constructing full sentence and using different tenses.
"That was amazing!"
"We are going to the airport."
"The bridge collapsed." 
"When Henry arrived, Thomas left."
"Thank you for flying Lufthansa, on time!"
Now not only does he speak English, but he can switch from English to German and/or Italian and back without any trouble.
He knows exactly which language to use depending on the country, the person, the book or the character of the story. For example, if he is playing with Thomas the Tank Engine, then he only speaks English. If he is a pilot talking to the manager at Frankfurt airport, he speaks German. If he has to explain something to me he switches to Italian.
Sometimes he mixes words from different languages or he adds "en" to an Italian word to make the German equivalent or "o" to an English word to make the Italian equivalent.
For example: "Der bridge ist schon damaged" -->German & English
"In dieser Direzionen" ("direzionen" from the Italian direzione) -->German
"Ora metto il Deckel e poi squeezo il dentrificio" ("squeezo" from the English squeeze) --> Italian and German
As with "squeezo", the results are often hilarious.

Life in “lockdown light” – week 3

Be a couch potato, be a hero.

It’s week three of lockdown light and the German government, or Bundesregierung,  has come up with a new strategy to convince young people to stay at home. They are running an online campaign with a series of ironic documentary-style videos showing old people reminiscing about the winter of 2020, a time when they were young and they became heroes by simply doing nothing. In one short film, an old man shows off the medal he was awarded for his outstanding contribution in the fight against coronavirus. He was a lazy slob, who stayed at home all day playing computer games and eating junk food. His friends used to make fun of him, but due to his laziness he became a hero because he stopped the virus spreading. The final message is: “Become a hero too and stay at home”, hashtag #besonderehelden or special heroes.

If the scenes at the Mauerpark last Sunday are anything to go by, it’s likely to be an uphill struggle. Clearly Berlin is not a city of couch potatoes. Crowds gathered at the park, which, by the way, has been enlarged recently. As well as people dancing in close proximity to one another (clearly in defiance of the AHA rules), there were multi-ethnic families having barbeques, aspiring musicians trying out new beats, aspiring acrobats trying out new tricks, graffiti artists spraying on the walls and the usual boules-playing gang.

Meanwhile in a different part of Berlin, Prince Charles was giving a speech, partly in German and partly in English, at the Bundestag, the German Parliament. He was attending a ceremony to commemorate Germany's National Day of Mourning for victims of war. Actually, his German is quite impressive! I wonder if the Prince of Wales is aware that there is a nightclub in Berlin named after him. Unfortunately, the club called Prince Charles, like all other clubs (in case you didn't know, Berlin is famous for its club scene), is closed due to the current Covid restrictions. I should point out that Prince Charles and Camilla are amongst the first passengers to land at the newly opened BER airport. It was worth opening a painfully delayed airport in the middle of a global pandemic after all!

Talking of the royal family, season four of The Crown is finally available to watch on Netflix. My favourite moment so far is when a mystified Margaret Thatcher, played by Gillian Anderson, wonders why she is wasting her precious time at Balmoral, while «struggling to find any redeeming features in these people» (i.e. the royals), who her husband describes as “boorish, snobbish and rude”. Meanwhile, Earls Court, where Lady Diana lives, is a place for “prostitutes and Australians”. That is according to Princess Margaret, played by Helena Bonham Carter. If you think you come from an odd family, don’t worry you’re in good company, even though you might not live in a palace or castle.

A very German problem

Today I am going to take a break from Brexit to address a really serious problem faced by anyone who lives in Germany: Why are so many Germans unfriendly and what can be done to improve their (and our) lives?

I really hate stereotypes and generalisations about nationalities, but after over 10 years (with a two-year gap in London in between) of living in Germany (Mainz, Weinheim, Saarbrücken, Berlin), I am still confronted with this problem on an almost daily basis.

Example 1) I've landed at Tegel or Schönefeld airport. I've barely got off the plane when I hear some angry person shouting in German about something trivial, such as, other travellers blocking the way or causing some other minor disruption. You've just got back from holiday for goodness' sake, you should be R E L A X E D!

Example 2) I've just got onto a shaky tram with Leo and we manage to find seats opposite an elderly couple. While the tram starts moving, I help Leo to his seat and his little foot inadvertently brushes against the knee of the old man sitting opposite. Most people would simile, but this man pulls a disgusted face and makes some unintelligible remark. The only possible reaction other than yelling at him: "Cheer up, you miserable old man" is to get up and change seats.

Example 3) There are roadworks and the cycle lane is blocked. The road is narrow and dangerous, while the pavement is wide, spacious and almost empty. So I cycle slowly on the pavement keeping out of the way of pedestrians, but a woman waiting at the tram stop shouts at me because I'm not on the cycle lane (which is inaccessible, by the way). Woman, R E L A X!

Example 4) I'm crossing a pedestrian bridge and I am pushing my bike with little Leo sitting behind in the trailer. At the beginning of the bridge, there is a sign telling cyclists to dismount. There are parents with pushchairs walking towards me and the narrow bridge is rather crowded. What does the guy on the racing bike behind me do? He shouts because I'm too slow! Er hello, do you realise we are on a pedestrian bridge and this is not the Tour de France?

Example 5) At the airport again, this time at the gate waiting to board our Brian Air flight. The Brian Air employee is rushing around checking everyone's bags and putting stickers on the larger ones. Suddenly the over-stressed and frustrated employee starts shouting and threatening a young petite lady in the queue, just because she has kindly asked him to talk to her politely. The non-German passengers are aghast and some of us go up to the lady to offer our sympathy.

These are just five examples, but I could go and and on and on...

So what can be done? 

We could start wearing t-shirts with slogans and carrying signs, such as, "Smile, relax and enjoy life", or "Life is too short to be miserable".

We could send all unfriendly Germans away for a year to Jamaica or somewhere similar to learn to relax and be friendly.

We could make relaxation and "How to be polite to people around you" courses compulsory.

Any other suggestions?

Of course, I'm not suggesting that everyone in Germany is like this. There are lots of friendly and smiley people in Germany. Unfortunately though, there are too many unfriendly ones and something clearly has to be done.

Europe's number one airline

I remember my first flight with Ryanair. It was from Bournemouth to (Frankfurt) Hahn and it cost around £10. I had just finished university and low cost flights were a novelty back then. Hahn was tiny and still looked like a military airport. It was (and still is) difficult to reach, especially from Frankfurt, but flying had never been so cheap and parking was free.

Over the years other low cost airlines emerged and whenever I had a choice I would avoid Ryanair like the plague. I was delighted when I moved to Berlin to find that there were plenty of alternatives and for years I hoped that either easyJet or airberlin would start a direct flight to Palermo. Alas, that never happened. For a while there was Air One, but that soon disappeared. There was also Wind Jet, with a stopover in Rimini, but that airline no longer exists.

Then Ryanair announced a new connection: Berlin Schönefeld-Palermo. So after a long break I had to force myself to start flying with Ryanair again. Although I still would opt for easyJet when given the choice, I have to admit that I prefer Ryanair's policy of allowing passengers to take two pieces of hand luggage on board. 

What I find really annoying (as I assume most other people do) is the constant selling and announcements, including the jingle at the end of the flight if the plane lands on time. 

What amazes me is the fact that they are always looking for new sales opportunities but, as I recently discovered, that can be tricky when you "only" have two and a half hours of flying time. 

On my most recent journey back from Palermo, shortly after take off, the flight attendants started their procession as usual with a drink and snacks service, followed by duty free, then scratch cards, second bar service, special duty free sale (all perfumes for €20) and, wait for it, third bar service. With all this selling activity, the poor pilot couldn't get a word in edgeways. While two flight attendants were still passing through the cabin with their trolley and stopping to serve a cup of Lavazza coffee to the gentleman sitting behind me, the pilot signalled that we would be landing in 15 minutes. The stewardess looked at her colleague aghast: "This is ridiculous, we are landing in 15 minutes!"- she told him. So the flight attendants quickly cleared everything away and while one steward advised passengers that we would be landing soon, the pilot jumped in to announce that we would actually be landing in 10 minutes. A few minutes later as the pilot told the crew to take their seats, it all quietened down and we were able to land. "Ladies and gentlemen welcome to Berlin, where the current time is 1.30pm. Thank you for flying with Ryanair. Anyone for a cup of Lavazza coffee?"

Berlin's biggest problem: dog fouling

Forget unemployment, rising rents, gentrification, air pollution, the "new" airport that will probably never open... the biggest problem in Berlin is the dirty pavements (or sidewalks if you prefer US English). Walking along the pavement without looking down every few seconds to check for dog mess is a hazard. Going for a walk in the park, especially if you dare to leave the main path, is like playing Russian Roulette with the soles of your shoes. Everywhere there is dog mess. Because Berlin may be full of children, but it is also full of dogs and rude dog owners. 

Some people are trying to tackle the problem with "no fouling" signs. The picture below was taken outside a Kita (children's nursery). It reads: "Children play here. This is not a toilet for dogs". I have seen similar signs near flowerbeds. Urban gardeners are clearly facing the same problem. Over the past month my son and I have stepped in dog mess three times.    

According to the website Bußgeldkatalog 2017, the fine for dog fouling in open spaces in Berlin is €35, while the fine for parking your car without a ticket for up to one hour is €15. Now I have a suggestion: Berlin is full of people working for the Ordnungsamt patrolling the streets day and night to check whether car drivers have paid the parking ticket. If half of these people started patrolling the parks and pavements and handing out fines for dog fouling, we might notice some improvement in the cleanliness of Berlin's pavements and paths and the council might even end up making more money. Berliners what do you think? 

How is this problem being tackled in other parts of the world?

Berlin with kids

Berlin is a great city to visit with kids. You will find plenty to do whatever the weather. With hundreds of playgrounds, two zoos, two aquariums, leafy parks, lakes and great museums, your kids will not be bored! 

OUTDOORS

Playgrounds (in German Spielplatz or Spielplätze plural)

Berlin has hundreds of playgrounds scattered around the city.

If your child needs a break from sightseeing or shopping, you will not need to search long to find a playground. Type in Spielplatz into an online map service to find the one closest to you.

Spielplatz am Heinrich-Lassen-Park

Some of the best playgrounds in Berlin are

Hirschhof Spielplatz (Prenzlauer Berg) – close to the Mauerpark.

Spielplatz am Wasserturm (Prenzlauer Berg) – it’s very close to Kollwitzplatz; green and child-friendly neighbourhood with lots of nice cafes.

Spielplatz am Kollwitzplatz (Prenzlauer Berg) – visit the market on a Thursday afternoon or on a Saturday.

Blauer Spielplatz (Mitte) – inside the Weinsberg Park, where you can get a bite to eat of a proper meal at the cafe/restaurant in the middle of the park.

Spielplatz am Monbijoupark (Mitte) – close to Museum Island.

Tiergarten – there are several playgrounds at different ends of the park; you could combine it with a visit to the Reichstag, Potsdamer Platz, the Zoo or the Aquarium.

Volkspark Friedrichshain (Prenzlauer Berg/Friedrichshain) – there are three playgrounds; this park gets very busy at the weekend.

Gleisdreieck Park (Kreuzberg) head to the Museum of Technology first and the stop off for lunch or dinner at the Brlo Brewery.

Spielplatz am Heinrich-Lassen-Park (Schöneberg) – brand-new playground with a castle. It’s right next to a swimming pool with a small outdoor pool and close to Volkspark Schöneberg-Wilmersdorf. It’s only a short walk from Rathaus Schoeneberg, where John F. Kennedy gave his famous “Ich bin ein Berliner speech”. Meanwhile, David Bowie fans might like to head to Hauptstraße 155, where the great artist lived between 1976 and 1978. There is a memorial plaque outside the building.

On a hot day, look for a Wasserspielplatz, a playground with water.

Swimming pools and lakes 

Some of the best outdoor pools (in German Freibad or Sommerbad) and lakes are

Kinderbad Monbijou (Mitte) – best for small children.

Sommerbad Pankow (Pankow) – good for all ages: there is a paddling pool for the little ones, a swimming pool for older ones and a leisure pool with slides and diving boards; it can get very crowded on a hot day and at the weekends, but there’s plenty of space on the lawn. 

Freibad Orankesee

Strandbad Weissensee (Weissensee) – good for swimming, sunbathing, having a drink and hanging out with the locals.

Freibad Orankesee (Hohenschönhausen) – good for swimming, sunbathing and avoiding tourists. There is a spacious and shady Biergarten nearby.  

Schlachtensee (Zehlendorf) – beautiful lake surrounded by trees located in the posh area of Berlin. There is a large beer garden and adjacent playground. It gets crowded at the weekends, especially close to the S-Bahn station.

Parks

Tiergarten – the city’s green lung. There are plenty of paths and hidden treasures to discover, as well as two nice beer gardens where you can stop off for lunch or a drink: Café am Neuen See and Schleusenkrug.

Volkspark Friedrichshain – large park with playgrounds, cafes and a beer garden but gets very crowded with local Berliners at the weekends.

Gleisdreieck – former wasteland converted into a park. I’ve written about it in the past.

Tempelhof – the old airport runway has been transformed into a huge park; very popular with the locals. Read my previous entry.

Mauerpark – get there early on a Sunday to avoid the crowds and visit the flee market; the karaoke starts at 3pm and will keep your older kids entertained. I’ve also written about this in the past.

Schloss Charlottenburg – visit the castle and/or walk, play, run in the grounds. 

INDOORS

Labyrinth Kindermuseum

Museum für Naturkunde (Natural History Museum)

Don’t miss the dinosaurs! Tristan Otto is the only original skeleton of a T. Rex in Europe to date.

Deutsches Technikmuseum (German Museum of Technology)

The museum has a huge collection of steam engines and is also a great place for plane and boat lovers. Don’t miss the Rosinenbomber on the top terrace!

Spectrum Science Centre

The Science Centre makes science fun for children. It is just across from the Museum of Technology and tickets are valid for same-day visits to both the museum and Spectrum.

Labyrinth Kindermuseum (Wedding) – the former factory has been converted into a spacious children’s museum, with a special focus on diversity. There are different areas and lots of things to discover and to play with. Aspiring chefs will love the large kitchen area.

Kindermuseum MachMit (Prenzlauer Berg) – housed in a former church, the large museum offers endless opportunities for playing, climbing and learning through play. There is also a cinema. The current exhibition, which has been extended to June 2019, focuses on Native American culture.

Legoland – housed in a basement on Potsdamer Platz, it’s noisy and expensive, with only artificial light. Parents hate it, but kids love it. Best to avoid at the weekend.

Zoo – it’s one of Berlin’s most popular attractions both with adults and children so it gets very busy, especially at the weekends.

Tierpark – not to be confused with the Tiergarten. The Tierpark is Europe’s biggest animal park and is in the Eastern part of Berlin.

Aquarium – the entrance is next to the Zoo. It’s a good place for the little ones and for fish and/or reptile lovers. Don’t miss the sharks! You can get a combined ticket for the zoo and the aquarium.

Sealife – it’s smaller and narrower than the aquarium. The best part is the lift that takes you into the AquaDom at the end: the massive aquarium inside the Radisson Blu Hotel lobby. It’s cheaper if you buy tickets online.

Berlin boat trip – the one-hour boat trip along the Spree is probably the best option for smaller kids. They tend to get bored after a while!