As the plane takes off and you look down, the familiar landscape gets smaller and smaller until it is out of sight. Floating in the sky above the clouds, once again you leave everything behind. Your home, your family, your friends, your language, your culture. You’ve been in this situation countless times, but it never gets any easier.
Around you noisy tourists chat about the places they’ve visited and where they stayed. They exchange tips and scroll through the pictures on their phones. For them it’s the end of the holiday – time to go home. You’re not sure where home is: the place you’ve just left or is it where you’re heading, the place you’ve made your home over the years?
As the plane touches down a couple of hours later everything changes. Suddenly you’re in a different country, with a different landscape, different people, a different language, a different climate, a different culture, different food. The sea has been replaced by lakes, the palm trees by oaks. This is also your home, but right now it doesn’t feel like home. The memories of your recent trip are still too vivid. Your body has been transported, but the mind takes longer to adjust.
The first morning you wake up in a daze, unsure of your bearings. It’s only when you look outside the window that the change becomes real. Bewilderment, nostalgia, sadness are familiar feelings. Soon life with all its chores, tasks and responsibilities will take over and your mind will be forced to catch up with your body. The memories will fade and everything will return to how it was, until the next time.
Thanks Linda for sharing these thoughts. I feel every word you wrote. I still remember the times I would go back to Manchester from Palermo and it was never easy, although I loved living there. For three days I wouldn't eat, then I'd get used to everything and felt at home. Like you write, your mind takes longer to adjust but eventually you feel less nostalgic, I think. Well, speak soon, Lilì. Ciaoo
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your comment, Titì!
ReplyDeleteI was inspired to write this after meeting an old family friend at the airport in Palermo on my last trip back to Berlin. It just made me think how common this experience is, but also how it is to feel torn between places and people. However happy and integrated you are in your new home, a part of you will always feel nostalgic about the place you come from. Of course, it's also a huge privilege and there are many benefits to being an expat, especially when it's a choice. Nevertheless, leaving and saying goodbye to loved ones is a sad moment and it takes time to get over it.